Inspiring New Book

I have not been writing much recently... I think perhaps not thinking much as well... The previous thing that really got my attention was when I was freediving and working on equalization. I became so excited as I discovered knowledge that did not exist before... And I wanted to contribute to it. I felt so wonderful everything I discovered something that goes against existing knowledge. People said it cannot be done, and I found out, it can be done. People said it must be done this way, but I found so many other ways to do it.

But things quieten down after awhile... I stopped reading, thinking, writing, doing... Life became a bit overwhelming as I exceeded my limits in terms of my own capacity to cope with life, with relationship...

I have some small gains recently... You know one of the most painful things in life is dealing with your own trauma or those trauma of others... This morning I had this thought while cycling to work... How much of our trauma becomes our own personality? And how much can we decide to overcome our trauma and craft out a higher personality that is not triggered or restricted by what is needed to avoid being traumatized.

I believe, at least for me, that my life path is much directed by avoiding my trauma; I took paths where I could feel more at peace with myself and the world, and meant choosing what made me feel good and avoiding what made me feel bad... But lately, I am starting to think... What if I faced what made me feel bad and challenged it such that I stopped avoiding what makes me feel bad. Would it develop my personality in a new way? 

Those thoughts aside... I am going to write a paragraph from the acknowledgement of a book. For those who really really know me, I get most excited at things like this... Here it goes by T. Colin Campbell from The China Study:

"I must also credit my colleagues who have worked to discredit my ideas and, not infrequently, me personally. They inspire in a different way. They compel me to ask why there is so much unnecessary hostility to ideas that should be part of the scientific debate. In searching for answers, I have gained a wiser, more unique perspective that I could not have considered otherwise." pg. xii, 2005

That is so admirable that he is not defensive or angry at his critics or the challenges he faces in his life and career, but instead he used that to refine his perspective, to be a better thinker.

I think I need to revive this blog to read, write, and think again. I think one of the things I hold on to and value is the ability to think for myself. It's not a natural ability as I was rarely given this opportunity or the right conditions to do so. Instead, I was also punished for thinking differently with strong voices pushing me towards having the same mind as them.

But now, I want to value my choice and ability to think things out my own way and not be afraid to do so. And not fear when there are strong voices telling me I am naive, stupid, wrong... But instead to use their voices to refine my own thinking and to become a better thinker.